(Summer II) First Forum

Today, we read this article in class:

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/06/23/opinion/sunday/coontz-the-disestablishment-of-marriage.html

You can see additional information here:

http://www.theatlantic.com/sexes/archive/2013/06/how-to-live-in-a-world-where-marriage-is-in-decline/276476/

At the end of the article, Coontz writes this: “But it’s not that we’re doing a worse job at marriage than our ancestors did. It’s that we demand different things from marriage than in the past. And marriage demands different things from us.”

Do you agree with Coontz when she says that modern people are not doing worse at marriage? Do you think that we are getting better at marriage? Please explain your ideas with evidence, examples, or other forms of support. Please share a link with us if you find something interesting online.

Can you post an additional question about this article?

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10 thoughts on “(Summer II) First Forum

  1. agree with Coontz’s opinion that is modern people are not doing worse at marriage. I think marriage is getting diversified. People starts to seek another purpose in marriage because “MARRIAGE” itself, is not the goal anymore. In fact, many Japanese women answered they cannot marry without thinking money according to survey of OZMALL. This seems to be because many Japanese woman regard marriage not as Fairly tale as reality. I think many Japanese women used to think they had no choice when they were average age of marriage. However, “Christmas cake” which is mentioned in Coontz’s is old concept now. (Marriage, Work, and Women in Japan. Yukiko Inoue-Smith) (Indeed, I din’t know this !!) We don’t have to be afraid of being “Christmas Cake”, we can be the ones who choose whatever we want to eat!!

    http://en.rocketnews24.com/2013/01/28/for-richer-or-poorer-what-japanese-women-really-think-about-money-and-marriage/

    http://www.quietmountainessays.org/Inoue.html

  2. I think it depend on the situation. Take Taiwan for example, most young Taiwanese decided not to get married or have a child in recent years. Due to they think it cost too much when you get married or have a child. On the other hand, in other countries like U.S., there are so much welfare for people who get married. So I think the deprivation and benefit of marriage is due to the social climate and institutional in a country.

  3. I would say the marriage situations depend upon different cultures. in my country wives are chosen by mothers. the couples do not know each other before they get married. Therefore, there are a lot of divorced situations.Also, If you get divorce from a wife that is already one of your kinship, you might break the family relation ships.

    • This marriage system is very interesting to me . We never ask our parents to choose our partners in my culture. However this often brings us many conflicts because we have to make our parents allow us to marry. It is very difficult between choice and permission.

  4. I agree with Scoontz ‘s opinion that 2/3 of couple who marry today are cohabiting before. From the past to now, the average age of marriage always change. I thought that we are from different countries and have own culture, so we have different standard of marriage. For example, in my countries marriage is most important to girls and their families. If you are living together before marrying , you ‘ll get less respect from the man side.

    • Great comment, Hang.

      It’s very interesting that marriage in your country seems to be associated more with girls and the family of the girl. However, you get less respect from men when you live together before marriage. These differing views from men and women are so interesting. I think we see similar things in many different cultures.

  5. I’m enjoying reading about our different cultures. We are lucky to have six people from six very different places. Let’s continue to share information about our different cultures. I think this will help us to better understand the material in our textbook.

    Good Job!

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